It's one of those kinds of days when everything is just wrong; I feel trapped, I can't even relate to myself, I just want to crawl under the covers and spend the day crying. These are the kinds of days that make the thoughts of suicide creep back in. I've already decided that it's not any kind of possibility, but that doesn't keep those thoughts away. I have no idea why these days happen, and no idea when they'll happen, they just do. All I can do is weather the storm, and hope the next day is better.
I'm looking forward to the long weekend, since it's about to be Memorial Day here in the US. That should at least be a little bit of a respite from the stress of work. I hope it will be some amount of a respite from the shadow that's chasing me, but there's no way to tell.
There's a Ronski Speed song that's getting some rotation on Area 33 these days called "Love All The Pain Away". I wish it were that easy.
The Collapsing Empire
1 day ago