Monday, January 26, 2009

Still here!

It's been quite a while since I've made an entry. Almost two weeks! Shame on me!

I haven't really had a whole lot to say lately. And rather than subject you to content-free posts, I'll just stay quiet. As I told my therapist last week, I'm just "being". I'm still feeling pretty good about myself and how everything is going, and things are just moving along, day by day.

My body feels fine, though my boobs (omg, I'm growing boobs!!!!) switch off from being painful, to being itchy, to being just kinda tingly and weird. Today is a painful day. My nipples have become very firm, and plenty more sensitive, though they haven't really changed in appearance. So I guess that'll be a pretty gradual process. We'll just have to wait and see on that score. My facial hair is probably about as heavy as it's going to get now, so it's probably time to call in and set up an appointment for another laser treatment. It's kind of interesting, that since I'm used to seeing myself with no facial hair, that even with a reduced amount there, it looks like it's soooo heavy. It's probably a combination of how I see myself in my mind's eye, and that I'm getting used to seeing myself in a particular way, and it's very jarring to have that image disturbed.

I'll have another first this week: K will see me in girl-mode for the first time. I'm going to K and L's for dinner on Wednesday, which is the only day they both have off. I've spent some time with L before, and she was excited to see me; K is a lot more reserved, but I'm sure he's pretty excited too. He's one of my very oldest friends, and I've known him for over half my life. The drive over won't be any big thing, but it always causes me a little anxiety when somebody sees me for the first time in girl-mode. And especially since my facial shadow is as heavy as it is.

I'm bringing dessert to dinner, as is my fashion, so I found a really awesome-sounding chocolate-orange cheese tart recipe to make. The recipe says it's very similar to cheesecake, and of course chocolate and orange are two great tastes that taste great together.

I've been trying to come out to one or both of my gaming group, but it's just not been easy. I've had a couple chances, and I just couldn't make myself do it. I think we'll be gaming this Saturday, so I might give it another try.

I recently did a little looking around on the local TG forum, about possibly finding a voice coach/therapist. There were several suggestions to try Melanie Anne Phillips's voice program, and since that will be much less expensive than even a single session with a voice therapist, I thought I'd give it a try. Hopefully that will appear sometime this week, and I can try it out. It can't get me to do any worse than I already am doing, can it?

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