Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Progress, or something

Over the past month, I've been trying to gather the courage to start back up with my hair removal. The laser treatment has been done for a few months now, so it's time to start electrolysis.

It's been hard to get going - a lot more difficult than starting any other process has been for me - and I'm not at all sure why. It's not the pain, or the cost, or anything about the procedures that is causing me anxiety. I knew about all those long ago, and I've known for a long time that I would need to go through the process of finding an electrologist. I feel like I've reached some impasse, and even this is not the thing I need to do in order to progress. In previous months, the various stumbling points have been related directly to the things I needed to start in order to progress - physical changes that needed to happen. This is another physical change, of course, but it just doesn't feel like this is some sort of turning point for me.

Regardless, it's something that I've needed to get started, so I went through my typical stalling and anxiety. I made my telephone calls, and did all my stuff, and found an electrologist with whom I'm comfortable. Now that I have finally found a person to do the work, it's just not that big a deal. I had my first hour of treatment yesterday. It was mildly painful, but it was WAY less so than a similar hour of laser treatment. A day later, my chin is still tender, but things are underway.

So why am I not happy that I'm finally progressing again?

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